Thursday, December 29, 2011

all i see is a happy ever after with you



all my life, there were so many things i have given up on.. i have always chosen the easier way out of any difficult situation mainly because i hate losing when i have given it my all.. but with you, it's entirely different.. having our paths cross again makes me feel that i was given another chance to make things right.. and above all, i feel that i was always meant to be with you and that i was probably born to love you.. i just didn't see it in the past because i was blinded by what i thought could give me eternal happiness..

what i'm trying to say here is that i'm going to take that chance and prove to you that we were made for each other.. because honestly, that is how i feel now! i don't get too many second chances, especially when it comes to my relationships.. that is why i'm willing to see this through the end.. i want to find out what's waiting for me at the end of the tunnel — what lies in it for me! and surely, i'm not going to give up without putting up a gahddamn fight because if i quit now, i might make the biggest mistake of my life and lose you forever.. most of all, i can't see things ending any other way!


so, good luck to me, love! ♥



Monday, December 12, 2011

all i want for Christmas is you...


I suspected a flood of tears would come racing down my cheeks and I would end up sobbing like crazy the moment I hear your voice, but, surprisingly, none of that happened – not even one drop. I guess I still have some pride left in me, I don't know. Nevertheless, it was a relief to finally hear you on the other end of the line. And for that, I am grateful. But hearing you say that you're coming back ignited a mass of emotions in my heart. I wasn't sure if I should be happy that you will, one day, come home to me, or if I should be sad that it couldn't be any sooner than I want. Because the truth is, if I could only have it my way, I'd want you right here, right now! Every passing day that you're not here shakes the very core of me at the very least. Yet the worst part of it all is that there is not a thing that I can do to make you want to come running back to me. Because, you are not mine. And, there was never an us.

But I miss you. I miss you so bad every day that it hurts. It is almost a month now since you left and the sickening feeling of not being with you it grows to a more depressing level with every passing day. Could I be more insane than this? I don't know. All I know is I'm so dumb to wish you were here with me and not there with her.

All I ever wanted was for this Christmas to be better than the last and maybe to spend it with you. But by the looks of it, I think I should prepare myself for the worse... :(