Monday, December 12, 2011

all i want for Christmas is you...


I suspected a flood of tears would come racing down my cheeks and I would end up sobbing like crazy the moment I hear your voice, but, surprisingly, none of that happened – not even one drop. I guess I still have some pride left in me, I don't know. Nevertheless, it was a relief to finally hear you on the other end of the line. And for that, I am grateful. But hearing you say that you're coming back ignited a mass of emotions in my heart. I wasn't sure if I should be happy that you will, one day, come home to me, or if I should be sad that it couldn't be any sooner than I want. Because the truth is, if I could only have it my way, I'd want you right here, right now! Every passing day that you're not here shakes the very core of me at the very least. Yet the worst part of it all is that there is not a thing that I can do to make you want to come running back to me. Because, you are not mine. And, there was never an us.

But I miss you. I miss you so bad every day that it hurts. It is almost a month now since you left and the sickening feeling of not being with you it grows to a more depressing level with every passing day. Could I be more insane than this? I don't know. All I know is I'm so dumb to wish you were here with me and not there with her.

All I ever wanted was for this Christmas to be better than the last and maybe to spend it with you. But by the looks of it, I think I should prepare myself for the worse... :(



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